how many cuts?

three cuts..
i know it's wrong.. and i'm so sorry.. but i couldn't let my self cry in front of them all..

i took a razor blade to school..
and i did it..
three of them.. in m arm..
it's much easier to cut with a razor blade than it is with anything else..
and it's.. better..

the pain it self almost made me cry,
the thought of what i've just done hurted even more..
but i've done it again.. and again..
three times..
i feel guilt..
but i also feel relief..
i'm so sorry.. i betrayed you... your faith in me..
but it helps me..
please understand it,,
and please don't stop loving me..
right now love it really all i need..
i'm so alone..
and it's tempting..
i've done it.. why shouldn't i just make another one..
it's good.. it helps..
i feel like it's the only way..